merideath: (snow)
I appear to be writing again. More fluffy crack fic but still writing. The story I'm on now has reached 802 words and should finish in a another few hundred. Plot bunnies are evil but it's writing so who am I to argue with them? *pets plotbunnies* Hopefully this means I am climbing out of my little wallow of depression that I have been in for the last couple of months. It's been worse and it wasn't medication worthy, this time anyway, I know what I'm like and that means that sometimes I need to be alone in my head an hide for a while till I feel human again. I love autumn but I miss my folks, I miss the states and my friends and things just have a tendency to spiral down for a bit. 

But hey I rediscovered Tin Man, fell in love with it and Neal McDonough's icy eyes. I've read  some pretty darn fantastic Tin Man fic that has kept me entertained and functioning and inspired me to write some silliness of my own. So there is some hope for me yet. I may post something tomorrow and consider crossposting the previous fic to [ profile] tinman_fic if I'm brave enough. 30 something years old and still a gorram coward about my writing skills or lack there of. Anyway this is just another rant and I need to crawl under my duvet with my iphone to read till I'm tired enough to sleep. Insomnia is fun kids. Not really.

*ponders plotbunnies*
merideath: (Default)
 I am bored and the Boy is watching Attack of the Clones for the eleventy-billionth time. I saw this meme on [ profile] kitschycookids lj so thought I would do it as well. its much more fun than cleaning or brushing my hair as we are pretending that zombies* are attacking outside. 

*= the annoying kids on the close that have no manners and WALK INTO YOUR HOUSE WITHOUT KNOCKING and wreck everything. I am fed up.

2011: I am a 33 year old housewife living in the middle of England with my 37 year old husband and 7 year old son. I craft and sell little handmade dolls, cards, pin badges and occasionally jewellery. I somewhat work for the studio (my husband is a photographer and I just do whatever minimal paperwork I need to do. I suffer from depression, low self esteem and homesickness for the states where I'm from. I have more friends on twitter and facebook than I ever have had in life. I am overweight and have little self control when it comes to food. My stomach is less than stellar. I am allergic to broccoli, sage, bananas on their own (I am fine with banana cake and fresh fruit smoothies with bananas in). I want to write but I'm afraid to really write beyond the confines of my blog and the little stories I write to go with the dolls I make. I sometimes feel I am utterly worthless. I don't do well in winter. I mostly hate this town though I do have a few friends here. I don't sleep well at night. when the sun is out I smile more, and we are going to visit my parents next month and this makes me very happy as I miss the states very much. 
2001: not a space odessy. I am 23 year old newly wed living in my mother in law's home and attempting to buy our first home. I work at Ikea Nottingham which is ok though I was so paranoid about working here that I am just working on the tills as a cashier instead of being a manager like I am qualified to do. I stopped painting and writing over a year ago. I'm not totally happy, but I am happy to be with Matt who I moved across an ocean to be with. I have no friends really, just one back home in California and another who is in Texas. I am not on the computer very much despite having met Matt a few years before on an X-files fans chat room. I am a geek. I also have severe issues with alcohol due to my mother's alcoholism.. I am a control freak.. I have burst into tears over chocolate bonbons that have alcohol in them WTF? I am probably depressed but I don't know this, or the fact that I have suffered with depression since highschool, I have never been to the doctor for it or much else, we never had insurance. 
1991: I am 13, living in California, we have recently moved from a little ranch house with a pear orchard and ponies to a suburb. My room is bigger and my best friend is living with us for months at a time because her family is breaking up. I am reading a lot, a book a day at the very least. I have been reading Steven King books for about a year.. year and a bit. I have a few friends but I'm very shy and have just got over a slight speech impediment. I don't play any sports except what we play in school.. we can't afford any extra curricular activities so I read, and run around the garden. I write little stories about abandoned animals, children, and an apocalyptic sci fi or two. I love history and want to be like Indiana Jones.. an archeologist not a womanizer with a whip. I have no allergies. I day dream in class when I get bored. I can't see the blackboard at school any more and my mother doesn't want to believe I need glasses. I am starting to not trust my mother any more, she drinks to much and we have nothing to relate to. I watch horror movies with my dad all the time. 
1981: I am three years old about to turn 4, we live in a farm house in a very rural part of New York state. The gander hates me and attacks me. The billy goat tries to kill me so my mother gives me a stick to scare it back. I have a puppy named Beauford ( he is very stupid.) and a cat called Daisy. There are two other dogs on the farm as well as cats, cows, pigs, chickens and the goats. Nobody really visits us though there is family a few hours drive away. we go for walks in the deep woods and everything is magic. I have lots of toys and books that I love. I am a quite kid with tangled brown hair, I climb trees and have ridden a cow. I love ladybugs, arrowheads, and the animals. I hate brussel sprouts.